In the city of Wiesbaden was a Postamt (V), which means it is a post office with administration like HR etc. From this place lots of post offices (without administration) were managed as well as the post offices at the countryside or in the outer suburbs. My first job was an extra for one of these post offices without administration, but the most necessary one. The ordinarie manager was going on holidays. The post office had 15 employees, most of them working at the counter. Some had to take care about the mail and parcels left. I had to care about that all was working smoothly and to take care about the money in the evening, that means to count and put it in the safe. Not only one day, one of the young women working there had a deficit for 1000 DM (German Mark – the currency we used in Germany before the Euro). We had still to add up the lists of the day by head. There were no machines, not even a small calculator. Though I had to add all the amounts and see, if there was a mistake. I did not found any. The young woman was in tears and I had to report it. The other days there were not really so much money missing, though I did not need to report it. Anyway I had a talk with the woman, asking her, how that can happen – and so often. I do not know, if she was allowed to continue her work, because the ordinarie manager came back.

By the way, I had to be the first every morning and open the post office with the keys, I had got. Once I forgot my keys at home, even I every day checked, if I had them with me. I was in really good time, but it was not really time enough to go home and back, but I had no other choice. I opened the post office a little late that day. The employees, who had to wait for coming into the post office were not happy. Fortunately no customer came to closed doors.

When I had found an own 1-bedroom apartment, I also bought a washing machine. The guy, who installed it, asked my out and I agreed. I had was actually engaged again – his name was Walter, but he was not in Wiesbaden och I thought, it would be nice with a friend. Before I could meet that guy, Walter was coming to Wiesbaden and he was very jealous. Though I canceled the meeting with the other guy. Actually I should have learned, that Walter was not the right man for me. Walter and I later married and moved out to the countryside, where we for the same price got a 2-bedroom apartment.

After this post office I had to manage another one with twelve employees. We also had meetings. After one of them one of the employees did drive me home, because there were no bus at that time. He did not drive to my home, but throughout the village and asked me for sex – or almost to suck his cock.

Not long after that, I have been told, that a civil servant from Berlin had asked for a job in Wiesbaden and got it as well as he become the manager for my post office. I had to work in the administration for the very small post offices with only one employee. I had a manager to work together vid. Though I got a less responsible work and I was disappointed. The duties were interesting, because I met lots of different employees. For such jobs, the employees have to be special. We had one post office at the American base. The employee had to speak English, what was not so usual at that time in Germany. The employment was not very well paid. I had to check the book keeping and more. This guy was very interested in social contact and I was talking with him for an hour or two. Afterwards I remorsed, but all was well when I was coming back to my office.

Anyway, I was looking for another job. You have to know, that a civil servant of the kind I was – and there were many of this kind, had not easy to find another job. Usually one cannot go to the authority for unemployment and ask for other jobs. However that year the law for children benefits was changed. Many more parents could get children benefits as before. While the children benefits earlier was handled by the tax authority now the authority of unemployment had to care about it. That was my chance – even, when I went to the authority of unemployment, I did not know that. I thought, there were civil servants, who could help other civil servants, when they would like to change job. To make the long story short. I have got a job on the same level as my education. I bekam a manager for four other employees, but first I had to learn about the law and how to handle the applications. I was learning by doing. Nobody had time to teach me. There was too much work. When I did not know, how to do, I was questioning.

We started in an old building and were moving soon to a totally new office. It was a very big building with seven or more floors. We were three groups like mine. We had a manager for us together and so on. There were different levels of, how we had to handle the applications. Simple applications, where the parents were married and there were only children from these parents, my workers had to take care about and I had to check, that they made it correctly and had to sign then. Complicated applications I had to care about and, when finished, give it to the manager for our groups, to sign. When we were told, that we were not working fast enough, I did many of the simple applications and let my workers sign afterwards. I was working much faster than them. To sign them, did not take a lot of time for my workers. I had some very complicated applications, which I had to ask for more papers and remind the parents as well to come with the papers. One of them did write, that they are waiting for too many weeks. They had, if I remember right, eight children and really needed the money. They also had sent all the papers, I just had not the time to care about that case, but did it, of course, when I got that letter.

We also had to work on Saturdays for some weeks, because there were so many applications. I was living with Walter at the countryside and he was free from work. He had bought a car a time ago and I had asked him another Saturday, if I may take the car to work, because the buses were not going often on Saturdays. He did tell me, that I could not take the car, because he needed it. When I came back from work, he had been at home all the day. Though another Saturday, when I had to work and he was off work, I just took the car without asking him – he was still asleep. When I came back home he was very angry at me. I did not understand that and told him, that we have to share everything, because we are married. He was never a help for me. When I want something put on a wall, I had to make it all by myself. He did not help with the dishes, the cleaning, the washing – she did not help with anything. I got angry at him for the car. He told me, he would have needed the car. He could go by bus that time, I told him.

I became friend with the postman at the one-employee post office in our village. Walter did not like it. He became jealous. One day, when he came home, the postman had been at our home and was just leaving. Walter could not see, if he had been at our home or with one of the other tenants. Walter had one of his hands in his pocket and hold it against me with the words. If I see the postman here again, I’ll shoot you. After that I asked for divorce. At that time it was still hard to get divorce in Germany. The postman was my witness at the court and Walter and I were divorced.

Unfortunately I did not learn of it. The manager for one of the other groups at work and I became a couple. His name was Hans-Peter. He was a little special, so was his friends. One of them made his own hit-parade. I did accept it. What I did not know at that time was, that he was an alcoholic. He was drinking in periods and white in between. He was divorced and had a three year old son. He was allowed to see his son once a month. We married and also had the son some Sundays. We were married for a while. Our first holiday together we spent camping in Denmark. The next year – in May – we were on holiday in Scandinavia. We had got four weeks of holidays at the same time. We started in Sweden, e.g. visited a friend of mine, which I knew by my godmother, and were going North, crossed the Swedish-Finish border at Haparanda, stayed some days at Lake Inari, continuet to Norway and took a ferry from the South of Norway back to Germany. I had to drive all the time, because Hans-Peter did not have a driver’s license. We were going by my little Renault 4 and started with camping, but it was still too cold, though we soon were renting huts or rooms in hostels or hotels. We made a horrible minus during the trip, because we did not calculate staying at hotels.

Soon after the holidays he did stay at home, telling me, that he is sick. However he did neither go to the doctor nor tell our employer, that he was sick. Though the employer were asking me, what happened with him and I told them, that he is sick and that I had told him to go to a doctor. He never did as long as we were together. I was a horrible situation for me.

I was thinking about my friend Göran in Sweden. He had been so great, when we visited him. We had more contact now and he visited us in Wiesbaden. I remember so well, that I gave him a duvet for the night, but it was too warm for him, even I fell cold during the nights. After a while, we agreed, that I would move in at Göran’s. I did prepare all very well, but did not tell Hans-Peter. He did not care about me, even he still lived with me, why should I care about him. I asked at my job for termination of my livelong job agreement, which I got, when I was 27-years-old. Our director was asking me, what I will do in the future and I told him I have got a job in Sweden. He was wondering, because he knew it is very hard to get a job in Sweden without being a member of a union. I answered, that I had got a job as a housekeeper. He accepted it and even he knew my situation with Hans-Peter, though he did terminate my contract.

I asked friends to stay over at thems the last night before I will leave Germany. Hans-Peter was not at home and I did not await him before very late. I put a letter on the table and was on my way to pack my car, when he came home. I did not sleep at my friends’ home, but the next morning. I left all my furniture and household items for him. I told him, that he could have it as long as he needs it. Then I drove directly to Sweden.

To read about my life in Sweden, follow the link for MY FIRST YEARS IN SWEDEN.

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